Journal 11/16/22- First Journal- Spaghetti at the wall is how I do it all.

When I look into the body and mind of my self within my consciousness fresh into this world, the self that had just been renewed, restarted, refreshed, that didn’t know this physical reality yet, roundly understand the processes and the excising of free will on this realm. In photos of my LilIzzy, you could see the fragmentation and discomfort from the beginning. This is what it feels like to be putting a blog together. There is always so much I want to share, so much that impacts my life every day, and so I hope that whatever you can get from this brings you joy, and the expansion of wonder of questioning everything around you. I want to share tools that can make your reality YOURS, creativity is served to do just this, but it’s a little different when you are reading conversationally rather than ambiguously that I have found to be blocked a lot within connecting with others about my art. Art is just up to anybody's interpretation within its symbolism, here is there verbal, nose-to-the-grindstone way in which I can cram the ever-flowing thoughts and inspirations into something that people can really think on with the mental, and not just feeling. SO without much more fluff, let'sget into it, get in there, yeah yeah!

I was born with a male twin and we are a great example of Yin and Yang, duality was always present within our relationship, and harmony comes from that. Differences make us complimentary. In whichever journey my twin came from before this life, this is a life where were have united forces to be a reminder that true connection is possible. From there I have found so many other reflections of myself within others. My partner, my inner circle of those who understand me, I see and feel these reflections. I have come to realize that there were components in my life that were meant to challenge me, and some that were meant to give me reminders of the truth of myself, the one before this life.

One amazing example is a friend that I have, and it seemed like our families were closely connected enough to the point that when she was practically born, we were friends, buddies. We have continued to be there for each other no matter where we were in our lives, and from that connection. These types of closeness in spirit and connectivity have proven pretty clear that the times that I and another have not seen each other, we were indeed learning the same lessons and the same types of emotions. Reflecting on those who were there for me, even in the darkest of times, I could still look towards these people and feel that connection, and I am grateful to recognize it in my current state of asking big questions, it is the levitational device for me, rising above the pull-shit that will keep you in a low state of frequency, adjust feeling negative about yourself and those and things around you. We are never alone, even when we physically are, and even when we don’t get the results we were “expecting”. This energetic connection can also overlap with those who are in your neighborhood, city, state, school, etc. If you stick around a place, say Minneapolis for example for a long time you become so energetically entangled with those around you, in all sorts of ways. The environments you put yourself in are very important. What I am trying to point out with this concept of locality is that being aware of those around you is going to show up within your “field” as we can call it. This dictates your energy levels, mood, and actions. I have been working in my city for a few adult years as well as many teenage years and have come across similar people over and over, of all different types. What I have learned from this is; vibes can change and if they feel right, take inventory of your environment and ask yourself what you want to feel like on a regular. From this takeoff of the SIMPLE AWARENESS of what may be affecting your field is the key for you to stay connected with your true self. However you want to exercise this awareness, whether it's meditation sitting, moving, or creating, it all works. I use multiple uses of meditation to get other people’s energy off of me. This first blog is a straightaway deep dive into my brain and anything I’m discovering, you can also discover. Cheers, to throwing spaghetti!